updates

Hey sorry people for not blogging for such a long time. Got caught up with settling here and homework! Gosh. Not easy man. LOL especially economics. Apparently the lecturer taught the whole A levels of economics in 2 lectures? I don't think it's that exaggerated. But yea, lots of things going on.

Can't blog about everything's that happened since my last post, so I'm just going to tell you guys the funny stuffs =)

Went to nottingham for the Malaysia Nottingham Games last week. It was fun. Met up with ex-classmates from college who were from Cambridge, Imperial, UCL, etc. Had a great time with them. Really missed them. Somehow I'm more...open when I'm with them. More hyped. I know when I came to london I wanted to do that too. To be hyped and full of passion. I guess I didn't prepare myself well enough before I came. But it's been only ... close to 2 months?? Gosh..I've been here THAT long?? Gosh..time DOES fly. =(

Oh wait, I'm supposed to tell funny stuffs not sad stuffs. LOL. Ok so, in my room there's a window and it's facing the other side of the hall. So if I stick my head out the window I basically see other people's rooms. Don't worry they have curtains so I don't go peeking into other people's rooms. LOL. But yea, one night, there was a sudden burst of music. Really loud, sort of rock music coming out from one of the rooms. And I heard a girl shouting something and the music went softer. Then I heard her say sarcastically, "Can you put it any louder?" And the guy answered, "Huh? Louder?" LOL. And I, being a real busy body, opened the window and stuck my head out. I looked up, and there was no one. Then as I looked down, there was this guy's head stuck out of the window, about 2 floors below me. He looked at me, smiled, and waved at me! =.= It was the most random thing. Haha I was so shocked I just stared. LOL.

And then last night, it happened again. I don't know if it was the same guy. But the song he was banging was "All by myself" by Celine Dion. It was so so loud, my room mate and I opened the window to and looked out. We couldn't tell where the music was coming from. My room mate was like, "Man...that guy must be really lonely."And the room right opposite my window, was this guy also looking out his window. And when he saw us he smiled. LOL. Guess he was just as shocked as we were. LOL. These people and their randomness. Funny, but if he sets off loud music in the middle of the night while I'm sleeping, I'll whack him!

Alot of other random things happened too but, too much to write it all down. People in london are so RANDOM! LOL. I hope I won't be?

Ok..time to go back to HOMEWORK! Tatas!

Updates!

Hey people!! I'm so so sorry for not updating my blog. Getting here and settling down was kind of a challenge but hey, here I am! Better late than never :)

When I was in the plane on the way here, I was already feeling homesick. And when I got here, I hated London. Somehow I felt Malaysia was better than London. In some ways, it is. But that only got me miserable and sad. I kept asking the question again and again; do I want to live in London in the future? Do I want to spend the rest of my life here? I kept complaining to my mom about it. And this is what she said to me :

Remember the reason you are here. To get a good education. To get the education Malaysia could not provide you with. To study. Don't keep thinking about living here long term or something. Think I'm here to study.

She is the best. As I start my university life, I began to like London more and more. Actually more like liking LSE. It was different then what I expected. In some ways a good different, some ways a bad different. But oh well, balance I guess.

And now, everytime that question pops up in my head, I know how to answer it.

So yea, life has been pretty good here. The first week was just briefing and there was Fresher's Fayre. That is when everyone goes to sign up for the societies they want to. My gosh, there were so many societies! I joined the Amnesty International, the Malaysia Society, The Actuarial Science society, The Finance Society, Christian Fellowship, RAG (Raising and Giving), The Maths and Stats Society, The Music Society...what else? LOL too much? Yea, I thought so. Sigh, I couldn't help it. There were so many more societies I wanted to join.

On the second week, lectures started. Lectures has got like 500 over people in one theatre. HUGE crowd. Because there are other people from other courses also taking the same subject. First year subjects are quite general. My subjects are Mathematics, Statistics, Economics B and Abstract Maths. Only in my second year will it be more specific to Actuarial Science. So far the lectures have been quite good. Next week, classes will start. Classes are different than lectures in a way that classes consist of about 15 students and 1 class teacher is assigned to each class.

One of the things I really love about LSE is the Student Union. They represent the students' voice to the administrative office. They have weekly general meetings and I went for the 1st one yesterday. It was amazing. Those with motions will give a short speech and those who go against the motion will speak against them. Sort of like a debate. Wow they had so many motions. And the way they debated was so exciting!! LOL. I was pumped up too. Haha. But yea, I guess listening to them debating opened my mind and challenged me to speak up and answer tough questions on the spot. Still abit timid, but gotta pray for courage to speak up and the wisdom of words to say.

I have so much more to say. But I have homework to do! Economics homework is due on Sunday! Haha because the homework is online. So yea, I'll be back to tell you guys more exciting and awesome stories happening in LSE and in London.

Miss you all!

LONDON

So much to say. Don't know where to start. But no time to write. Cause there's so many things to do. For starters, my room's a mess. I really need to start arranging my stuffs. And I have to start budgeting. I've been using money and not keeping track of it.

Will come back later when I have more time in my hands. Like maybe tomorrow. :)

Tatas

Sighhhhh

I just submitted my documents for student visa. Please God, please give me my student visa!! :S So scared I'll get rejected or something.

Started packing. I know it's going to be really overweight :D. And I haven't finish!

Need to do chest X-ray. And medical examination. Sigh.

Farewell parties........Why can't I have it on a weekday? Everyone's so busy on a weekday. I'm so free on a weekday! LOL. So mean right, sorry lar. It's just that weekends everyone's squeezing something in. Come on! I've only got 4 days of weekend left! :S


Sighhhh. So many things to do in such little time.

And I have to take Meningitis C vaccination in London! =( Oh I hate injections. =(


Ahhhhhhh!!

The beginning of a journey

I've seriously lost the mood to blog. Everytime I feel like sharing something, I come online but I feel so lazy to blog. LOL. I still haven't even taken the photos of my birthday party from my dad's laptop. But anyway, I had my birthday dinner in Xenri restaurant. Had great food :D. The end. Lol.

About another 4 weeks till I leave Malaysia. I'm so scared. I haven't been sleeping well the past 2 nights. Don't know if it's because I'm scared about going to London or something else. Started packing already. Hopefully my luggages won't be over weight. I hope they'll upgrade me to business class :D:D. Not only because of comfort, but also because business class allows 2 hand luggages. My mom wants me to bring my violin along, which is considered a hand luggage. I haven't been playing with my violin for a very very long time. I hope the strings are still fine. *Oops*.

I was reading the LSE Student Union guide last night. It made my excited. And scared! It's exciting to join the many different activities LSE's going to have. There's this event that really caught my eyes. It's called Reclaim The Night march, a women-only march against rape and male violence. I really want to go. It's going to be an eye-opening event. My mom was a little worried though when she heard about this march. But the book assures that it'll be a safe event.

There're also information about transport, night clubs, food, markets, etc. It's going to be a totally different environment for me. There'll be lots of debates and talks bout current issues, environmental issues, and issues like equality between men and women, etc. I just hope I won't be too timid to discuss about them. I hope I'm brave enough to speak my mind, no matter how dumb I might sound, no matter how shallow I might sound. I just hope and pray for the courage to speak. And hopefully learn lots from other people.

I've been really lazy this past couple of days. Don't know why. I need to start being alert, start reading all about economics. I can't be lazy anymore! I can't! *Slaps self*

It's the end of a journey, and yet a beginning to another journey. The path looks scary and uncertain, but I know for sure I won't be taking it alone.

I want to stop disappointing You. But everytime I try to pick myself up, I fall again. I need Your strength to pick me up and keep me from falling. I need Your strength to keep me from disappointing You. I want to start anew with You...I want to come back to You...

Can't be lazy! Can't keep disappointing Him! I need strength! I need the passion to work and not just speak!

LSE, you can't scare me! Lol. Being weird huh.

Laazzzyyy!!

Wow..I haven't posted anything for almost a month! I don't know why but everytime I open my blog I feel so lazy to update it. So much for having a blog. Well, got to wait for inspiration to come =)

I know I'm supposed to upload my birthday pictures but erm, I haven't even gotten them from my dad yet >.< I'll get it and upload it...when I have the mood. ;)

Haven't been doing anything useful for the hols. Just the usual eat, sleep, watch tv, go online, shop abit here and there. Kit Yan and Clarice have been driving me around. Watching movies, eating dinner and crashing in each other's house. Hehehe thanks girls! >.<

I really wanted to go overseas for the holidays but so far the furthest I've been from home is Ipoh. I just came back from Ipoh actually. Putting on alot of weight! :( Sigh, I really need to start losing weight! Can't wait for next week though! Shen's coming back from UK! Yay! And we'll be going to genting with Kit Yan, Clarice and Joanna! Oh I can't wait!!

An amazing thing happened to me last week! I got 4 A's for A levels!! Praise God!! I really couldn't believe it. I got A for further maths! And Physics! LOL I actually kind of gave up on Physics. It's so hard! But thank God I got A for it! He IS awesome! I never thought I would get straight A's for A levels. And that means I'm going to LSE!! Yay! And if all goes well, I'll be sharing a room with Wei Tse! Double yay! Haha.

I'm actually having mixed feelings about LSE. I'm feeling excited, nervous, happy, scared, insecure...and alot more. I'm happy to go to LSE but I'm scared of living on my own (sort of). I'm excited to meet new people there but I'm scared I can't mix well. I'm excited to study in LSE! But I'm feeling insecure. I'm afraid I can't keep up and I'll drop out of uni! :S

But I'll always remember what Kit Yan said :

"God has brought you this far in life. He's given you straight A's for your A levels, allowing you to go to LSE. What makes you think He won't be with you then?" (something like that)

It's true. He has been helping me and guiding me through life. Never in my life would I thought of getting straight A's for SPM but He made it happen. Never in my life would I thought of getting straight A's for A levels but He made it happen. He made everything I thought was impossible possible. Even when I let Him down so many times He still helped me. I should really stop disappointing my Big Daddy.

So here I am! Going to LSE feeling scared and insecure, but I'll put my faith in Him! Even if I should fall flat on my face, I'll still put my faith in Him and just pray for His strength to pick me up. =D

This is what happens when I don't update my blog. I get long-winded. (*blush*). Lastly I just want to say all the best to Chong Wei! I really hope he can make it to the finals and get Malaysia the gold!

* I should really update my blog more often. Make it short and sweet =D*

Horrible in directions

I'm so horrible in directions. Honestly! And today I wasn't the only one.

I went for Korean Stone BBQ with Kit Yan, Joanna and Clarice for dinner. It was fun BBQing the fish, chicken and lamb, and also eating steamboat. The only thing was that the BBQ made our faces oily and the hot butter from the pot kept splashing and burning us as we were cooking the meat. Otherwise, it was fun. Really missed hanging out with Kit Yan, Joanna and Clarice. Someone was missing though. At least she's coming back in August, then we'll get to hang out! ;)

After dinner, I sat in Kit Yan's car and Joanna sat in Clarice's car and we went to some hill to see the view of KL. It was awesome to see the lights lighting up KL at night. After that, I followed Clarice's car to go home while Joanna followed Kit Yan's car to go back to their place.

And guess what? Clarice and I got lost! LOL! It was so funny. We took the wrong turning and ended up in the middle ring road heading towards KLIA. We actually passed Cheras and we passed Kit Yan's church (Charis Christian Centre). Fortunately, we managed to take a U-turn and head home. A little late but at least we found our way home. Embarrassing but hilarious. Haha. I bet Kit Yan and Joanna are going to be laughing their heads off when they hear this story.

LoL I'm really sorry but I'm bad at directions! Haha. Oh well, it was an adventure. Embarrassing but funny adventure. Hehe.

Will blog and post pictures of my birthday celebration as soon as I get the pictures. =) Feeling tired now. So...

Night!

24

I have about 24 hours to make the most out of my 19th birthday. And somehow I worry that I won't enjoy it as much as I want to. Kind of dumb worrying that way, huh.

*Takes deep breath*

Here goes!

Oh by the way, I just realised..I'm 19. I'll be 20 in a year! Gosh...so old! :S

**Ok ok chill. One at a time, Joanne.

Haha. Enjoy this day! All of you! Because it's my birthday! Haha

Just grateful

Have you ever taken a step back and just look at your life and think, "Wow...how did I get here?" And I don't mean in a bad way. More like, looking at your life in awe.

Of course there are things in life that didn't quite go my way. There were times when I thought, "Aargh, why did I do that? That was so embarrassing!" or "I wish I never did that, it made my parents/friends/relatives upset." And of course there were times where I look at my life and felt like it was meaningless, thinking, "Why is this happening to me?" or "I wish I was never born into this world."

But the thing that overshadows all these sections of my life, is the thought that goes like this, "Wow, awesome...It's amazing at how God has been working in my life." There are so many things that happened in my life where I thought it was impossible, like it didn't make sense. But it did happen. Coincidence? I don't think so. Because there would've been too many coincidences in my life.

There are many things in life that I do regret. For the times I disappointed my parents. For the times I disappointed God. For the times I fought with my brother. For the times I had stupid fights with some people who could be great friends, but I blew that friendship. If I were given the chance to go back, would I do it all over again? Maybe. Maybe not. Whatever it is, at least now I know what to do if I were to face the same situation in the future. To turn regrets into life lessons.

I do fear the future. The paths I’m going to take. But, at least I do have this security that God will help me through it all.

All in all, I'm just grateful I got this far in life. I'm just grateful that God has been so awesome in my life and that He is still doing awesome stuffs in my life. I'm just grateful for the people around me He blessed me with. I just thank You, God.



Happy 19 to me. =)

=)

I had the weekend to think things through. About what exactly I'm upset about and what I can do about it.

I'm bumped cause I keep being judged and blamed. It's ok to judge me but I'd rather it be done behind my back rather than at my face.

Then I had a talk with Kit and what she said was right. I don't have to prove anything to anyone. So why am I trying so hard to?


I miss you..But I like it better when you where happy rather than depressed.

Anyway, I've decided not to be sad. Not to be depressed. For what? Over other people? No. I'm going to be happy. To be joyful. A pastor once said, "Be happy. Don't be depressing. Christians are happy people."

So I'm going to be happy. Not sad. Not depressed. Especially not because of other people. I know myself. I know my mom brought me up good. I know what I'm good at I don't have to prove it to anyone.

=) I do feel much better. Because for once I'm learning not to take people's crap and get depressed because of it. =) Not easy to do. But at least I'm learning =)

Cheers!

Ramblings

I feel like rambling. But nothing seems to be coming out. At least not in words.

To say today is better? Maybe. But not really.

I keep hearing this today -- God has a purpose. Whatever happens God has a purpose. So what is the purpose for this?

I feel so stressed!!!!!! And I don't even have any exams.

I tried not to be depressed. I really do. I really don't want to be so sad. But I can't help it!

As Kit would say, I mix all my problems into one big problem and start rambling about it.


But...what's the problem?

Depressed

I give up...I seriously give up.





On life...on everything...





Life doesn't seem to have a meaning now.





When I think of the future I feel so...scared. So depressed. I feel like giving up. Not just the "when I'm in university" kind of future. Even tomorrow. Next week. The week after. I feel...like I don't want to go through it.



In one of the lowest point of my life now. Feeling depressed. Feeling useless. Unprepared for the consequences about to hit me right in the face. Feeling judged...wrongly.

Sooooo depressed =(

Chateau Des Lumiere

That's the theme for my college prom on friday. Don't ask me what it means, I don't know french. LOL. Anyway, I didn't bring my camera along for prom because my camera wasn't working so I just got the pictures from Han Yang and Yao Siang. Thanks you guys!

Good news and bad news. Good news: it was pretty fun. Ate my money's worth like Kit Yan said. And had fun taking pictures and seeing people dressed up and there were some pretty cool performances especially the ones by the lecturers.

Bad news: I look horrible in the prom pics. Not all but most of them. My arm looks gigantic! Gosh. This really calls for a diet! And exercise. :(

Not going to write much, just going to let the pictures speak for themselves :) Enjoy!

A band. Played a few songs.

FOOD!!


Prom King and Queen having a go at the dance floor






















Talk to the hand! LOL.

Shy? ;)












Wei Tse and me


Su Lyn, Wei Tse and me

Wei, me, Su Lyn, Fifi! Hehe*she hates that I call her fifi*

The girls with Ms Ching, the maths teacher




The girls (7 girls in a classroom of 20+)


The guys (not all are here)



This..I have to say, is pretty awesome! The lecturers dancing!

The class (not all here though)


The class with Ms Tang, our further maths 2 teacher.




Weeeeee......

Us with further maths 1 teacher, Mr Peter. One of a kind.


Kok Foong, Su Lyn, Wei Tse, me


Meng Kit, Azrul, Wei, me


Han Yang with us.


Tian Yi and Afiqah. The class is always teasing them. They do look cute together, don't they ;)

Roses.


Well, that's all the pictures I am posting. It's almost 3am now. Takes a long time to upload all these pictures. *Yawn*, before I sleep just want to say a few words about my class.

It has been great to have these guys and girls as my classmates for a year and a half. The laughter we shared, the lame jokes we shared (or more like I shared ;))....truly memorable. Thank you, guys and gals, for helping me with work, especially those who explained again and again the things I didn't understand (you know who you are). Thanks for the lunches we had together for 1 and a half years. I will always cherish the times we went to As You Like It just to eat the tom yam there. I'll really miss that tom yam. LOL. You guys and gals are just so great! And I wish you all the best in your life and in your future! Love ya loads!!

Signing out.

PROM!

So much for watching movie the other night. It was too late. Oh well, the incredible hulk is out!!!And Edward Norton is acting in it!!! Ahhh, exciting! He's such a great actor. And he's so cute! >.<

Tonight's my college prom. And it's friday the 13th today! ....Spooky? Maybe we'll have the malaysian version of Prom Night. LOL. Nah, I don't believe in friday the 13th. Doesn't spook me out. Feeling a little excited and a little scared for tonight though. I've put on so much weight during the exams I feel fat when I'm wearing the dress. :( And I hope and pray that no one will ask me to dance....because I can't!!! LOL. I'm serious, if someone asks me to dance I'll freak and run to the toilet! LOL.

One thing's for sure, I'll definately take Kit Yan's advice : "Eat your money's worth." Haha. So true!

I'll be uploading pictures. Till then, bye!

It's over!

HEY PEEPS!!!!!!!!! WOHOOO. Gosh! I haven't written anything in this blog for so long even Nick Chew is thinking this blog of mine is fake!! LOL. (*Fake IS the opposite of not real right? ;) *)

Hahaha.. Wow, it is great to start blogging again. Really sorry for abandoning this. I've been busy preparing for exams. And yup! It is over! Exam's over! And that's not all....A levels is over too!! I've officially finished my 1 and 1/2 year of A levels course. Awesome? Awesome! Haha.

I must say, this year has been a hectic year. And it's not even over yet! Since the beginning of this year I've been busting my ass studying and preparing for the A2 exams. And I have one advice to give ya'll. DON'T STUDY LAST MINUTE!!!! Lol. Seriously I've learnt a great lesson. Since my further maths exam is only during A2, I pushed it aside during AS. The consequences? I have to study further maths for 1/2 a year. LOL. Seriously! I didn't touch further maths. And this year when I read the book I felt so lost! But thank God, I've got tuition, which really helped alot.

It hasn't been an easy year but thank God because He guided me through every single step. Even when I've disappointed Him so many times, He never gave up on me. I seriously could not have gone through life without Him. I've known people who condemn God, and saying how ridiculous it is, to believe in Him. But honestly, can you imagine a life without God? Honestly, I can't. Everytime my faith fails, and I push myself away from God, I can't help but to get back to Him. And I once heard someone said that we believe in God because we are all insecure. Which is so true! Can you say that you've been through life without once being insecure? Haven't you thought, what will happen if this or that? What will happen to me if this does not work out? I am not ashamed to say, that I have had these thoughts in my mind. And I am grateful to say that I have God to cling on to. =)

Well, I've got to go now. Going to catch a movie! Maybe Indiana Jones or Prom Night. Ooo I saw the trailer for prom night it looks pretty cool! Haha. Spooky but cool! Haha alright I'll be back! BYE!

Back

Whoa... amazing. The last post was during CNY. I haven't blogged for that long? LOL. Anyway, as Shen would put it, cobwebs are starting to grow in my blog. Hehe.

Sorry lor. This year has been a really hectic year... and it hasn't even ended! Now's april but I feel as though it's July. Remember in my previous posts I talked about how hectic A2 is going to be? Well, now reality is really setting in.

Tomorrow will be the end of my two weeks holiday. It was supposed to be the studying time but...didn't really work out the way I planned. A2 is just in another 3 weeks, maybe less. And honestly I still don't feel ready. Further Maths especially is my biggest concern. I need an A for Further Maths if I want to get into LSE but so far I can only manage a C. Really need to push this 3 weeks time.

Sigh, it has been such a bumpy ride. Broke down a few times. But God has been faithful. And He hasn't forsaken me, not once. Even when I turn my back on Him. And yea, really praise God for my trial results. It was better than I expected. Just hope I won't be too laid back then.

And Shen, it's not that I don't want to choi you. It's just I havent touched the computer for a long long time. A2 is really killing. Really miss you lar. See ya soon k?

Till then tatas

CNY

This...is melissa's dog, Ashley. And this is how she's looking at me...as I am eating cookies. LOL. Staring at me with those puppy eyes expecting me to give her some. LOL. Sorry girl, I don't think I'm allowed to give you table scraps. But you're just so adorable!

I'm in ipoh now, in my grandparent's house. Staying here for the chinese new year. Going visiting tomorrow. Goody! Ang paus! =) hehe.

Sigh, I wish this week will never end. I don't want to go back to college! :(

I've got conditional offers from universities offering actuarial science but I'm not sure whether to take it or not. And that is if I can even meet their offers. The stress is on. To work hard. Honestly, I'm not sure if actuarial science is the course for me. I don't know what course is the one for me. I just want to do what God wants me to do. And honestly, I think I'm limiting His choices since I'm only applying for actuarial science and nothing else. LOL. But I really don't know what other course to apply for. Recently I've been hearing testimonies from my friends about how God guided them to the course they're doing now, and it's really encouraging to see God working in their lives, leading them to the right path. God, please guide me too. I don't know where's the right path. I really need to start praying for my future.

Matthew 6 :33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well
I've been hearing this verse from 3 different people already. Once during camp. Another one from my friend, and the latest one from a pastor. I feel like this is some sort of advice or something. Because recently I've been worrying bout my A2 exam. Especially further maths. And I've been staying back in college to study in the library. I think I'm putting my studies before God. Sigh...this is going to be a tough year. But yea, as I said my friends have told me about how great God has been, and I'm sure one day I'll have similiar testimonies to tell others too. :P

Anyway, just want to wish you guys a happy chinese new year! Gong Xi Fa Cai! Get lots of ang paus! Save some for me! *Just kidding* God Bless people!

God is soooo good!

I'm in college :P. Our teacher realised that we won't be able to concentrate even if he teaches so he let us go. Why can't we concentrate? :P. It's because we just got our results at approximately 11.50am. And truly truly praise God and thank God.

The AS exam was like a roller coaster physically and mentally. Especially when I felt I didn't do good in my physics practical, my chemistry practical, and my chemistry paper 2. And also the anxiety over the possibility that I'll have to retake the exams if I don't do so good. Putting my faith and trust in God was a real challenge for me. But it paid off. I was just praying yesterday, asking God to prepare my heart for the worst. I don't want to put my hopes too high, because I was afraid I would cry if my results didn't reach my high hopes. But at the same time, I really do hope and pray that I'll get good results, so that I won't need to retake the exam. And as I was praying, it struck me to give thanks to God, even before my results are out. And even as I was giving thanks and praising God for my results (which was not known yet), I truly felt peace and comfort and my heart was really prepared. My results will make an impact in my future. God has my future in His hands, and it is a beautiful future. Whatever my results may be God will give me what's best for my future. And truly, He has given me the best.

God, You've always guided me in life. From the day I was born till this very day. You've guided every academic results and even when I felt like I wasn't going to do good, You did the impossible. This time it's the same thing again. I felt like I didn't do good for AS exam, but this time I felt like I was really going to do really bad. But Father, You've guided me all my life, and I know You won't bring me down this time. And God, I really thank You and praise You, because once again You did something that I felt was the impossible. Truly God, with You NOTHING is impossible. Father, here are my results. I commit them to Your hands, and I just glorify Your name for it. This are not my results. It's Yours. Thank You Big Daddy. And I love You!

By the way, I got 3 A's and 1 B. B for Thinking Skills. Praise God!! =)

*Something funny I want to share. When I told my father I got B for thinking skills, he said, "Aiya, I know you cannot think wan." Hahaha!!!

“Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. “I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours…” Mark 11:22-24

Prepare my heart oh Lord.

Father, I put my trust in You. I put my faith in You. Father I believe that whatever happens, You know what's best for me. Father, please prepare my heart, please strengthen my heart. I don't want to put my hopes too high, but I do hope for the best. But Father, please prepare my heart, prepare me for the worst. Heavenly Father, help me not to be nervous, help me not to be anxious, but to just trust You. I just commit this into Your mighty hands. You know my life even before I was born. And I trust that whatever I get is Your will. Father You've guided me so far in life, in every exam and the results, and I know You won't forsake me or leave me in this. Whatever I get, Father I just want to thank You and praise You. Father, help me not to cry if they're bad, but strengthen me. Father, I give You all the glory and praise. Thank You Lord Jesus. And I'm sorry for the times when I disappointed You. In Jesus most precious name I pray, Amen.

I will not be afraid...for Thou art MY GOD!

My message

First of all, I haven't been checking my blog since my last post on funny pictures. And today I realised that there were new comments on the post "Continuation of girls camp 2007 --- Homosexuality and the Ex-gay Lifetstyle"

The reason why I posted all the notes I got from Pastor Edmund's workshop is to share with others what I have learnt and also to hear other people's opinions, because I do believe that everyone has a right to let their voices be heard. But even as I read the new comments today, I really regret posting the post. The post has travelled as far as into Pastor Edmund's blog! (malu-fied)

I realised that this post has hurt certain people, and I am afraid would hurt Girls Christian Camp. But what is done is done, so I just want to say I'm sorry 1st of all to Pastor Edmund and Pastor Amanda for anything in this post which has offended you. I do hope you will forgive me. 2nd of all I want to say sorry to Yuki, if this post has caused you hurt. I will follow Pastor Amanda's advice and to pray for you, for I believe God has great things in store for you, just as He has in store for everyone else.

Lastly, I just want to wish Pastor Edmund and Pastor Amanda all the best in life and their ministry and truly pray that God will use them to the fullest for His glory. Also want to pray that God will continue to guide Yuki, to speak to her and to be ever so real in her life.

God bless.

Funny pics

Am I really long winded? Cuz I'm starting to realise that most of my posts (the written one) are really long. LOL.


Anyway, for a little entertainment >.<. Here're some funny and cute pictures.


Want to go toilet? Sure. It's just THERE! Haha!


Do you speak-eh dee english??


Lost : Have you seen this cat? If you have please contact 03-********. Urgent! Very very precious cat! Please call us if you see her!


I just asked once! XD

Hahaha!

On the 1st day of college....

It’s 11.14pm on Tuesday (8/1/2008). I can’t go online now because my brother is using the internet to watch Dragon Ball Z. Boys… LOL. So anyway, I just feel like blogging and writing down my thoughts even though I can’t post it now. Today’s the 1st day of college after a “LONG” holiday. (my brother has 3 months of holiday now that’s why he’s so free to watch Dragon Ball Z) It was pretty cool. I mean I saw my new timetable and it looked so awesome. There were times when I start at 9am and some times I finish at 1 or 2pm. But there is one day that I finish at 4pm, because of Chemistry lab.

Today, in class, I don’t know why but I suddenly felt so hyper. LOL. I was… yea, pretty noisy. Maybe it’s because I miss college? *shrugs*. Almost everyone came to college today with a new haircut. LOL. Some cut their hair short, some changed their hairstyle, it was pretty fun to see all different kinds of hairstyles. Mine was the worst. Don’t know why but today my hair was really frizzy. Maybe I didn’t put enough hair cream. XD

AS results are coming out on 20 something Jan!! :S. Was almost freaking out today. I mean I always felt like I could have done better in the exam and I always thought of the worst case senario : don’t get A for AS and no good university will take me. But every time I think of that I think of this : God has been so good to me. He has guided me in every aspect of life. He has taken care of my education, my future etc. What makes me think that He is going to pull me down this time? I know my God won’ leave me nor forsake me. I know that He has a bright future for me and I trust that He will continue to guide me whether in education or anything else, because He HAS always been guiding me anyway. So yea, I will not freak and put my faith in God :P.

Today I got a taste of what it was like to be in the same college as my cousin. Hehe yup. Melissa’s in taylors college …with me! Didn’t get to have lunch with her though because our lunch breaks were different. But she wasn’t alone so it’s cool. After college, my aunt fetched me and Melissa to Melissa’s house. I had to spend a few hours in my aunt’s house because my parents have gone to my father’s company dinner and my brother went out for dinner with his friends in mega mall.

Unfortunately, nobody asked me out to dinner tonight so I was supposed to be home alone. But my mom didn’t like the idea of me being home alone at night so she asked me to crash in my aunt’s house for a while. Hehe. Anyway, Miss Melissa was rushed to the ER a few minutes after we touched down at her house. Ok ok fine, it wasn’t that dramatic. But yea, Melissa came down with a terrible sore throat, high fever and a pounding headache so my aunt had to fetch her to the docs (nope sorry, not ER). And you know what? This wonderful cousin of mine brought a really small bottle of water to college, not even 500ml, because she said it’s heavy to bring water to college. =.=“ Hello??? Water ain’t fashion alright. LOL. Drink more water lar Melissa Foong! Put some sense into her. LOL. No wonder she fell ill.

Anyway, my parents came to fetch me at about 10.30 or something, and on the way home, I told my mom about my friend who got conditional offer from Cambridge. (I will not disclose her name here because…it’s private!! LOL) Congrats to that girl by the way, you know who you are ;). So yea I was telling my mom about the good news and also I found out that my aunt’s friend’s nephew (who also happens to be in taylors) also managed to get a conditional offer from Cambridge. Cool right? Congrats to you people yea!

And my mom was like saying, “why didn’t you apply for Cambridge.” And I said, “I know I’m not going to get any offer from Cambridge, why waste money to apply?” (It’s about 50 pounds I think) And she was saying, “you haven’t even try, how do you know you’re not going to get any offer?” And she started saying that I don’t want to fight for the best and I don’t want to try… things like that. But honestly, if you ask me, do I regret not applying for Cambridge (or Oxford)? I’ll say this : Definitely not. I don’t want to fight because I don’t want it in the first place. I wasn’t going to give my money to Cambridge or Oxford (no offence >.<). And I’m not very smart. Seriously I’m not. I’m pretty average and honestly, I’m happy to be that way. I mean I do feel happy for my friends who are really really smart, but I don’t envy them (or at least I don’t think I do). Because I’m happy for who I am. Average. And I couldn’t ask for more :) So there, all my thought written down. Or at least, typed. Haha. I’m going to go to bed now. Feeling pretty tired. Was sneezing a lot after sending Melissa to bed. Scared I’ll get her virus. LOL. So I’m drinking lots of water and eating oranges (vitamin C mah). Haha no offence, Melissa. Get well soon yea! And also to my other cousin, Richard. Get well soon, boy. I really miss the great times with ya. You know, when I was lonely in college (during the 1st few days last year) I just needed to call/sms Richard and he’ll keep me company. He is a really great person, and I’m happy and proud to be his cousin :P. So long, fair well, I wish to say goodnight……zzzzzz

2008!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR PPL!!!!! Sorry for the late wish. Celebrated 2008 in India. India....no words to describe it.

My trip in India was 50% good 50% terrible. The thing I love about India was the historical places. We went to loads of places like the Bangalore Palace, the Amer Fort, the Red Fort, the Qutub (something, forgot the name), and loads more. But the best among all was....the Taj Mahal. It was simply beautiful. The pictures are still in my dad's laptop. Will post it here when I've collected them. And oh yea, I also loved the hotels :P. But the thing I hated about India was the dust, the dirty and smelly toilets (wooh, beat Malaysia no time) and the driving (van and cab drivers). Terrible. Worse than terrible.

Where should I start? We landed in Bangalore, India at night. And my dad's friend was there to pick us up (He's got a flat in Bangalore which is where we were going to stay). Drivers in India are crazy. Seriously. On the way to the flat was like a live musical performance or something. Our cab driver was horn-ing every now and then, and so are the drivers around. Sometimes they just horn for no reason. And there are no proper lanes. The drivers just change lanes whenever they like. Scary! And U-turns...gosh, so super scary. Can't even describe it. And oh yea by the way, our cab driver in Bangalore...was a 18 year old guy.

But...it is quite sad in India. I mean, there are either super duper rich people in India, or super duper poor people in India. There are no mediocre people. And it's just sad especially when we were in the cabs or the vans, whenever we stop at the traffic lights, there'll be beggars knocking on our windows asking for money. Most of them...are young children. They either beg for money, sell things like newspapers, or do a performance for you. Once in Delhi, there was this girl, she knocked on our window and started dancing and doing tricks with her hands in the middle of the road. I mean, it was so dangerous. A motorcycle could have knocked her or something. And in historical places where we were sight seeing, there were beggars coming after you for money. Again, mostly small kids. It's just so sad. No kid should ever have this kind of childhood.

Then in Bangalore we went to this temple. Newly built. And it was huge, really really huge. And obviously costed alot of money. And it really got me thinking. The amount of money spent building that temple could have been used to help the poor. To keep those kids off the streets. To give them a better childhood. Of course, alot of people want their temple/mosque/churches to be really nice and beautiful and all. But, shouldn't God's people be put 1st before God's house? What do you think? Honestly I think the money should be used to help people, the poor and the sick, rather than to build a really big house of worship.

Anyway, India was a real eye opener for me. I mean it really got me thinking alot. Especially seeing those children. It wasn't a really good holiday, but it was a good experience, and a good eye opener.

Oh well, college's gonna start soon. 7th January. And honestly, I'm not ready to go back to college. It's gonna be a really hectic and stressful year. Trial's going to be around March and Finals is going to be around May. Gosh. I hope I won't push God aside and be so caught up with work. Sigh. I really need Him.

And oh yea, my AS results should be coming out soon. I'm just going to put my trust and faith in Him. Whatever happens, God, I'll still thank You and praise You!