LONDON

So much to say. Don't know where to start. But no time to write. Cause there's so many things to do. For starters, my room's a mess. I really need to start arranging my stuffs. And I have to start budgeting. I've been using money and not keeping track of it.

Will come back later when I have more time in my hands. Like maybe tomorrow. :)

Tatas

Sighhhhh

I just submitted my documents for student visa. Please God, please give me my student visa!! :S So scared I'll get rejected or something.

Started packing. I know it's going to be really overweight :D. And I haven't finish!

Need to do chest X-ray. And medical examination. Sigh.

Farewell parties........Why can't I have it on a weekday? Everyone's so busy on a weekday. I'm so free on a weekday! LOL. So mean right, sorry lar. It's just that weekends everyone's squeezing something in. Come on! I've only got 4 days of weekend left! :S


Sighhhh. So many things to do in such little time.

And I have to take Meningitis C vaccination in London! =( Oh I hate injections. =(


Ahhhhhhh!!

The beginning of a journey

I've seriously lost the mood to blog. Everytime I feel like sharing something, I come online but I feel so lazy to blog. LOL. I still haven't even taken the photos of my birthday party from my dad's laptop. But anyway, I had my birthday dinner in Xenri restaurant. Had great food :D. The end. Lol.

About another 4 weeks till I leave Malaysia. I'm so scared. I haven't been sleeping well the past 2 nights. Don't know if it's because I'm scared about going to London or something else. Started packing already. Hopefully my luggages won't be over weight. I hope they'll upgrade me to business class :D:D. Not only because of comfort, but also because business class allows 2 hand luggages. My mom wants me to bring my violin along, which is considered a hand luggage. I haven't been playing with my violin for a very very long time. I hope the strings are still fine. *Oops*.

I was reading the LSE Student Union guide last night. It made my excited. And scared! It's exciting to join the many different activities LSE's going to have. There's this event that really caught my eyes. It's called Reclaim The Night march, a women-only march against rape and male violence. I really want to go. It's going to be an eye-opening event. My mom was a little worried though when she heard about this march. But the book assures that it'll be a safe event.

There're also information about transport, night clubs, food, markets, etc. It's going to be a totally different environment for me. There'll be lots of debates and talks bout current issues, environmental issues, and issues like equality between men and women, etc. I just hope I won't be too timid to discuss about them. I hope I'm brave enough to speak my mind, no matter how dumb I might sound, no matter how shallow I might sound. I just hope and pray for the courage to speak. And hopefully learn lots from other people.

I've been really lazy this past couple of days. Don't know why. I need to start being alert, start reading all about economics. I can't be lazy anymore! I can't! *Slaps self*

It's the end of a journey, and yet a beginning to another journey. The path looks scary and uncertain, but I know for sure I won't be taking it alone.

I want to stop disappointing You. But everytime I try to pick myself up, I fall again. I need Your strength to pick me up and keep me from falling. I need Your strength to keep me from disappointing You. I want to start anew with You...I want to come back to You...

Can't be lazy! Can't keep disappointing Him! I need strength! I need the passion to work and not just speak!

LSE, you can't scare me! Lol. Being weird huh.

Laazzzyyy!!

Wow..I haven't posted anything for almost a month! I don't know why but everytime I open my blog I feel so lazy to update it. So much for having a blog. Well, got to wait for inspiration to come =)

I know I'm supposed to upload my birthday pictures but erm, I haven't even gotten them from my dad yet >.< I'll get it and upload it...when I have the mood. ;)

Haven't been doing anything useful for the hols. Just the usual eat, sleep, watch tv, go online, shop abit here and there. Kit Yan and Clarice have been driving me around. Watching movies, eating dinner and crashing in each other's house. Hehehe thanks girls! >.<

I really wanted to go overseas for the holidays but so far the furthest I've been from home is Ipoh. I just came back from Ipoh actually. Putting on alot of weight! :( Sigh, I really need to start losing weight! Can't wait for next week though! Shen's coming back from UK! Yay! And we'll be going to genting with Kit Yan, Clarice and Joanna! Oh I can't wait!!

An amazing thing happened to me last week! I got 4 A's for A levels!! Praise God!! I really couldn't believe it. I got A for further maths! And Physics! LOL I actually kind of gave up on Physics. It's so hard! But thank God I got A for it! He IS awesome! I never thought I would get straight A's for A levels. And that means I'm going to LSE!! Yay! And if all goes well, I'll be sharing a room with Wei Tse! Double yay! Haha.

I'm actually having mixed feelings about LSE. I'm feeling excited, nervous, happy, scared, insecure...and alot more. I'm happy to go to LSE but I'm scared of living on my own (sort of). I'm excited to meet new people there but I'm scared I can't mix well. I'm excited to study in LSE! But I'm feeling insecure. I'm afraid I can't keep up and I'll drop out of uni! :S

But I'll always remember what Kit Yan said :

"God has brought you this far in life. He's given you straight A's for your A levels, allowing you to go to LSE. What makes you think He won't be with you then?" (something like that)

It's true. He has been helping me and guiding me through life. Never in my life would I thought of getting straight A's for SPM but He made it happen. Never in my life would I thought of getting straight A's for A levels but He made it happen. He made everything I thought was impossible possible. Even when I let Him down so many times He still helped me. I should really stop disappointing my Big Daddy.

So here I am! Going to LSE feeling scared and insecure, but I'll put my faith in Him! Even if I should fall flat on my face, I'll still put my faith in Him and just pray for His strength to pick me up. =D

This is what happens when I don't update my blog. I get long-winded. (*blush*). Lastly I just want to say all the best to Chong Wei! I really hope he can make it to the finals and get Malaysia the gold!

* I should really update my blog more often. Make it short and sweet =D*

Horrible in directions

I'm so horrible in directions. Honestly! And today I wasn't the only one.

I went for Korean Stone BBQ with Kit Yan, Joanna and Clarice for dinner. It was fun BBQing the fish, chicken and lamb, and also eating steamboat. The only thing was that the BBQ made our faces oily and the hot butter from the pot kept splashing and burning us as we were cooking the meat. Otherwise, it was fun. Really missed hanging out with Kit Yan, Joanna and Clarice. Someone was missing though. At least she's coming back in August, then we'll get to hang out! ;)

After dinner, I sat in Kit Yan's car and Joanna sat in Clarice's car and we went to some hill to see the view of KL. It was awesome to see the lights lighting up KL at night. After that, I followed Clarice's car to go home while Joanna followed Kit Yan's car to go back to their place.

And guess what? Clarice and I got lost! LOL! It was so funny. We took the wrong turning and ended up in the middle ring road heading towards KLIA. We actually passed Cheras and we passed Kit Yan's church (Charis Christian Centre). Fortunately, we managed to take a U-turn and head home. A little late but at least we found our way home. Embarrassing but hilarious. Haha. I bet Kit Yan and Joanna are going to be laughing their heads off when they hear this story.

LoL I'm really sorry but I'm bad at directions! Haha. Oh well, it was an adventure. Embarrassing but funny adventure. Hehe.

Will blog and post pictures of my birthday celebration as soon as I get the pictures. =) Feeling tired now. So...

Night!

24

I have about 24 hours to make the most out of my 19th birthday. And somehow I worry that I won't enjoy it as much as I want to. Kind of dumb worrying that way, huh.

*Takes deep breath*

Here goes!

Oh by the way, I just realised..I'm 19. I'll be 20 in a year! Gosh...so old! :S

**Ok ok chill. One at a time, Joanne.

Haha. Enjoy this day! All of you! Because it's my birthday! Haha

Just grateful

Have you ever taken a step back and just look at your life and think, "Wow...how did I get here?" And I don't mean in a bad way. More like, looking at your life in awe.

Of course there are things in life that didn't quite go my way. There were times when I thought, "Aargh, why did I do that? That was so embarrassing!" or "I wish I never did that, it made my parents/friends/relatives upset." And of course there were times where I look at my life and felt like it was meaningless, thinking, "Why is this happening to me?" or "I wish I was never born into this world."

But the thing that overshadows all these sections of my life, is the thought that goes like this, "Wow, awesome...It's amazing at how God has been working in my life." There are so many things that happened in my life where I thought it was impossible, like it didn't make sense. But it did happen. Coincidence? I don't think so. Because there would've been too many coincidences in my life.

There are many things in life that I do regret. For the times I disappointed my parents. For the times I disappointed God. For the times I fought with my brother. For the times I had stupid fights with some people who could be great friends, but I blew that friendship. If I were given the chance to go back, would I do it all over again? Maybe. Maybe not. Whatever it is, at least now I know what to do if I were to face the same situation in the future. To turn regrets into life lessons.

I do fear the future. The paths I’m going to take. But, at least I do have this security that God will help me through it all.

All in all, I'm just grateful I got this far in life. I'm just grateful that God has been so awesome in my life and that He is still doing awesome stuffs in my life. I'm just grateful for the people around me He blessed me with. I just thank You, God.



Happy 19 to me. =)